On Her Wedding Day
by luna-magic-2005
Summary: His foot hovered on the first step of the church’s stairs, indecision warring inside of him. Could he really do this? Could he really stop his brothers wedding in hopes of claiming the bride? Sequel to On My Wedding Day. Sessh/Kag


Standard disclaimer applies.

On Her Wedding Day

Grounded

By: Luna

...

The air conditioned limo rolled to a silent stop in front of the grand church on Sakura Drive, and Sesshoumaru Eishi could only stare at the tall spires reaching towards the heavens. His palms were sweating, and it irritated him enough to swipe them clean on his pants before allowing a small frown to show on his face. He hated the fact that he was nervous, as much as he hated the fact that he was even here at all.

He was being a damned idiot.

Why was he here? Did he really think that he could just walk up those stairs and steal his brother's bride? They once had been what some would call "close" but after Inuyasha took the edge of competing a bit too far, Sesshoumaru couldn't stand to see the changes happiness had brought to his little brother; changes that should have happened to _him_.

He wouldn't deny the jealousy he felt for his brother. While it was true that Sesshoumaru had gained more success and money, it was Inuyasha that held the gold: Kagome Higurashi, a woman who didn't even know his name.

Even to this day, nearly seven years later, Sesshoumaru remembered every detail of her face, what she had been wearing, and even the sound of her voice. He and Inuyasha had been walking back from the martial arts gym where Sesshoumaru taught and Inuyasha took lessons at (from a different instructor, of course), where he had spotted her attempting to climb the stairs with a large box in her arms.

At the time, her midnight hair was shorter, reaching only to her chin. The natural curl of her hair and the shortness of it made it difficult to contain, and he remembered feeling amused that she still attempted to squeeze the ends into tiny little pigtails that didn't even keep her bangs or half of her hair from getting in her face. She had worn tiny little shorts and a red and white tank top, with red and white shoes that didn't have any shoe laces. To Inuyasha, it looked as if she just got back from a long road trip. To Sesshoumaru, she just looked like a slob.

But a beautiful one.

Her blue eyes were narrowed in concentration and her cheeks were puffed out as she tried to balance the box while walking up the stairs, muttering about why shrines always had to have a billion stairs to climb before reaching the top. But she had looked up then towards the top where an old man was waiting at the top of the stairs, a smile spread from one leathery cheek to the other. She smiled then, so sudden and blinding before she ran up the rest of the stairs with a sudden burst of speed and managed not to drop the box until she reached the old man, dropping it at his feet before enveloping him in a bear hug.

Sesshoumaru had felt sucker punched.

He had felt Inuyasha's eyes studying him and quickly schooled his expression back to normal. But even then, had he already know that it was one second too slow? That Inuyasha would take their competitiveness to another level? At the time, Sesshoumaru knew that Inuyasha only started dating Kagome so that he could claim he had her first, thinking that it wouldn't matter to Sesshoumaru. That it wouldn't even matter to him; she would be just like the others and not matter.

But Inuyasha started to change. Slowly, he started relaxing more, smiling more, and made friends that were outside of his family's circle. He stopped swearing so much because he knew Kagome didn't like it, and he started applying himself to both his job and nearly everything else in his life. Father was happier and more pleased, and that woman he disgraced himself to marry seemed pleased too. He was still rash, and still flailed during martial arts than used actual skill, but he was still becoming more than Sesshoumaru was ever able to express. _Better_. The word left a bitter taste on Sesshoumaru's tongue.

And Sesshoumaru could only stay silent and watch, feeling blackness swell up inside him. People say that jealousy's color was green; Sesshoumaru could say differently. It was black, worse than hate since it ate at you slowly, reminding you every day that you could have had something better if only you hadn't been a coward and asked her first; if he had only started pursuing her before his brother sank too deep in her heart. Slowly, the blackness had consumed him, and he was what he had always hated and sworn he would never be.

A carbon copy image of his father.

Rarely did he speak to Inuyasha after that, and if he did, it was to either cut him down or to answer with sarcasm. How could he when Inuyasha had everything Sesshoumaru had ever needed? Perhaps it was selfishness for him to act this way, or childishness. But Sesshoumaru really couldn't help it. Or he tried not to. Then Rin appeared on his doorstep, supposedly his ex wife Kagura's unwanted offspring. He hadn't wanted her there at first, hating that she interrupted his solitude and brooding.

But she was so cheerful. She smiled all the time, laughed, and picked him flowers. She was so different from what he was used to, and he couldn't help but be drawn to her. Slowly, he found himself opening up, if only to her when no one else could see. She would follow him every where she was able to, and he admitted he wanted her there with him. But she needed more than a father like him, and Sesshoumaru admitted that he wanted more too. For Rin, but for himself too.

So here he was, sitting in his car outside her wedding and feeling irritated that he could hardly get himself to get out of the car. Slowly, he forced himself to open the door, climbing out before Jaken could get to it first. With the same slow deliberation, he walked towards the stairs and let his foot hover on the first step before making his way inside.

He walked, ever more slowly down the long padded walkway. Large white lilies hung from the walls, with glitter and ribbon tresses hanging to give it an ethereal appearance. He stopped, however, when he saw an open door way. A large full bodied mirror was seen, and in it held _her_ reflection. She glittered and shone like a white diamond in a princess styled dress, her hair piled and curled atop her head and threaded with gleaming pearls and tiny flowers.

She was smiling, looking so happy his chest hurt.

He stopped, watching as she looked over her face, her dress, her hair. He saw her take a deep breath, then turn and exit out of a different door. She walked down the hall, her head at such an angle that he knew that she was taking in her surroundings. She walked towards a wrinkled old man – the one he recognized from that very first day – and looped their arms together. Another older, attractive woman stood with the bouquet, and Sesshoumaru assumed that was her mother. She looked teary as she handed over the pink flowers before the music started and she hurried inside to take her seat.

When she disappeared inside on the arm of her grandfather, Sesshoumaru couldn't take it any more. His heart was hurting as well as his pride. How could he have been so stupid as to think that he could really stop this wedding? _She didn't even know who he was!_ Spinning on his heel, he walked as fast as grace would allow and almost ran down the steps. Jaken was already there waiting for him. As soon as he reached the car, Jaken obediently opened the door for him.

Shocked was one word that could explain how he felt when, all of a sudden, he heard the light pattering of running feet before a ball of white puff hurled itself in his car, and he could only stare dumbly as he watched Kagome's face scrunch in determination as she reached out and slammed his car door shut right in his face. He and Jaken stood with both of their hands still in mid air, Jaken where his hand had been holding the door and Sesshoumaru's stopping just short of touching the car siding. What the hell?

While they both could still only stare at the closed door like idiots, once again Sesshoumaru heard someone running and closed his eyes in irritation, wondering what the hell was going to happen next.

"Sesshoumaru!" It was Inuyasha. "What the hell are you doing here? Did you see a woman in a wedding dress come by?"

What a dumb ass question. He made himself sound like a fool. Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Sesshoumaru scoffed and turned to give Inuyasha a condescending glare, managing to raise an eyebrow and stare down his nose at his little brother at the same time. He was still angry at Inuyasha despite the years, and the embarrassment at what he had almost done still burned just beneath the surface, so it was easy to fill his voice was contempt when he spoke. "What, little brother, you can't control your women?"

Inuyasha bristled like a dog and clenched his teeth. His cheeks were blushing from either anger or embarrassment, and his eyes were darting all over the place. "Shut up! Did you see her or did you not?"

Sesshoumaru cocked his head to the side and considered Inuyasha. Kagome had run away; she had obviously changed her mind about marrying Inuyasha. Why? Should he give her away? Logic and a very deep and very (_very_) hidden kernel of caring for his brother told him that he should, that no man should suffer the embarrassment of being abandoned at his own wedding in front of his entire company and clientele. And yet… the woman of _his_ dreams sat hidden mere inches away from him.

And Sesshoumaru Eishi was never known to be a saint.

He reached for the car door handle after giving a small shrug. "I have not."

Sesshoumaru waited until Inuyasha gave an irritated growl and sprinted away before opening the car door. Kagome scooted over to make room for him, the poofed out layers of her skirt taking up the majority of the seat lining the far side of the limo. He couldn't help but watch her. His eyes traced the curve of her blushing cheek, the deep blue of her eyes and the plump bottom lip she was currently biting. He only realized when she shifted that she wasn't used to his reserved expression, and tried for her sake to relax a bit and let down his guard. So he gave her an amused look and raised his brow, trying to ignore how awkward it was to smile and how pathetic it was to feel unused to smiling at all. "I assume you're his missing bride?"

She looked away, her face aflame with embarrassment and fiddled with her skirt. "Er, yeah." Then she brightened suddenly, sticking out a gloved hand. "Hi! I'm Kagome Higurashi! And you must be Inuyasha's brother, right?"

"Half brother." He said automatically, and inwardly frowned for having such weak control of his tongue. She was still smiling, and for a moment he let himself act a fool and basked in her smile, something he wasn't used to in either his circle or his family. Then he took her hand and gave her a firm shake before pulling back and introducing himself to her. "Sesshoumaru Eishi."

She studied him for a moment with a smile before leaning back and sighing. "I've put myself into a pickle, haven't I?"

He couldn't exactly keep up his awkward effort of smiling, so he smoothed his face down into the comfortable lines of impassiveness. He watched her look out the window when the limo started rolling, and felt irritated enough at his awkwardness to get angry. And since he didn't know what to do with himself or his hands, he reached for a file that he had left next to him on his seat and lifted up a part of her poufy skirt to get to them. He didn't need them or particularly want them, but since he was unsure of what to do he started rifling through them, pretending he was searching for something and hoping he looked like he knew what he was doing. Then he said, "Am I correct when I state that you have no place you particularly wanted to be right now?"

Her nose scrunched up prettily as he watched her consider before she finally said, "Er, no, not really."

Relief was almost unwelcome as it flooded through him, so he brought his eyes back to his papers and asked brusquely, "I'm in a bit of a rush at the moment, so I hope you don't mind coming with me as I make stops."

She waved her hands in front of her face and laughed a bit. "Of course not! You just do what you gotta do."

He didn't know what else to say, so he didn't say anything, only occasionally looking up at her until, ten minutes later, he saw her eyes widen in amazement when they landed on the control panel. She scooted on her hands and knees, looking like a lopsided carnation flower. Where the pollen might be all he saw were her delicate ankles and feet sticking out amidst the poofiness. He amused himself with watching her feet and thinking how uncomfortable they must be in those high heels, and unfortunately allowed his fingers to slacken around his papers the moment she pressed a button on the panel, making nearly every window roll down.

His file was ripped from his fingers, and as he watched in horror as the papers spun around in a mini tornado in the center of the limo, Kagome started frantically pressing more buttons. Sesshoumaru could have almost gasped when the sun roof opened and that tornado of papers flew, literally, right out the window. Then the radio started playing at the top volume and the T.V. rolled down from the ceiling broadcasting the news. He could only watch as she pressed even more buttons, and the window blocking Jaken rolled down. She snapped her head up and must have looked at Jaken in the review mirror, because she gave a nervous laugh and sounded panicked when she asked, "Uh, help?"

Irritated and finally able to move out of his shock, he grabbed a remote he kept on his side of the car and starting putting things to right, first rolling up the windows and closing the sun roof and then shutting off both radio and T.V. Kagome slowly looked over her shoulder at him, her face sheepish before she ducked her head and guiltily dropped her eyes to the floor. He was almost amused before he remembered he was mad, and glared at her when she finally began helping him pick up the remainder of his scattered papers.

"I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru." She said with her voice full of remorse. "Here you are helping me and I'm ruining it for you. Is there anything I can do that will help you?"

"Sit there and be quiet." He was sorry his voice came out so curt, but now he'd have to go back to his fathers building and print them out again. Still, he couldn't seem to control his motions when he snatched the papers from her and started rearranging them in his lap. Again, he felt guilty for grabbing them from her so abruptly. He was relieved, however, that she made him feel at all. He could go for days feeling nothing, and it was a relief to even feel anger. Maybe it was pathetic and wouldn't attract a woman like Kagome to him, but Rin seemed to love him and he hoped that was a good sign.

He felt her eyes on him and refrained from looking up, letting her take him in, probably for the first time. He hoped she liked what she saw, but at the same time hoped she wasn't comparing him to Inuyasha. They were nothing alike in any way. Where Inuyasha could easily express himself, even as a child Sesshoumaru wasn't able to. He didn't know what was wrong with him, or even why he had been born the way he was, and hoped she wouldn't find him too flawed as she continued to watch him. Without looking up, he reached for his lap top and felt her watching his hands, and hated himself for thinking she might find his too delicate compared to the calloused hands of sporty Inuyasha.

Finally, he felt her look away, and let himself see her face. She was looking out the window, her face and eyes sad. "You know, I never thought that I'd ever do this to Inuyasha."

He stopped what he was doing and listened to her intently. Even though he wasn't one to talk much, it gave him the opportunity to listen, and he would always listen to what Kagome had to say. She sighed a little. "I had loved him once, really I did. And I'm sure he loved me too."

She seemed to be waiting for him to say something, so he closed his lap top and sighed a little. "So why did you run out on him on the day you two were supposed to get married?" He didn't mean to make him sound like he didn't care, and he hoped she still answered him. He _really_ wanted to know her answer.

Pausing, he watched as she stared down at the glittering diamond engagement ring that sparkled from her ring finger and felt a pang in his chest somewhere. "I… I don't know." She said haltingly. "I guess I didn't feel it. We grew apart, and then he met Kikyo."

He allowed himself to be shocked for only a moment before contempt filled him. How _dare_ Inuyasha. "You're saying he dishonored you?" His voice was low and he tried to keep the rage from showing.

Kagome looked up with a mixture of surprise and gratefulness on her face. "No. I mean, he says he never did, and I trust him."

That answer didn't appease him, and he simmered with rage. Here Sesshoumaru, who to everyone else had everything ranging from money, fame, and good looks, would have gave everything of himself for this one woman, and his brother chose to squander that away with someone different? It was just like his brother to take everything for granted. She may not be mad, but he supposed that was okay since he'd be plenty mad for her.

She looked away again with a frown, and he watched as she absently blew a stray curl away from her face. "But I've seen the way he looks at her. As if everything doesn't matter except her." Here, her expression did turn slightly angry and somehow a little sad. "He looked at her like that right as I started to walk down the aisle, and I couldn't seem to breathe. I had to get out of there, and I knew I couldn't marry him. Not when he looked at her like that and not me."

If only he could express himself, Sesshoumaru thought. If only he had the capacity to make her see what he was really thinking; what he was really feeling. He waited until she looked at him, willing her to see at least a little, or as much as his eyes would allow. "He did dishonor you."

She looked away, a smile on her face that was at odds with the look in her deep blue eyes. "In a way, I guess he did."

The rolled to a silent stop, and he waited until Jaken opened the door before sliding out, leaving everything behind. He was just going to reprint everything anyways. He waited for Kagome to get out, and when she didn't, he leaned down and looked at her with a raised brow. "Are you coming or not?"

Kagome blinked in surprise before she smiled brilliantly at him and scooted towards him, gratefully taking his offered hand to help her out. He ignored the looks they received from his fathers employees and relaxed his face so the vein in his forehead wouldn't tick and reveal his aggravation when Kouga, the man his father replaced him with, whistled at him. "Whoa! Were you so desperate for a bride that you had to go and steal one?"

Touga Eishi was a prominent business man and often times could be cruel to get the things he wanted. When he found out Sesshoumaru had secretly created his own business behind his fathers back, Touga had gone into a rage. Sesshoumaru had never been the kind of son he wanted, and he only managed to grow satisfaction when Inuyasha did great things, yet grew forever severe when it came to Sesshoumaru's success. And since Sesshoumaru managed to succeed without his family, Touga did everything he could to belittle Sesshoumaru when he left.

Sesshoumaru managed to get a hand in nearly everything that went on in the business world, ranging from a five percent share in his fathers advertising company and the success of his own weapons corporation, and at least one finger in all their competitors businesses. Yet he still managed to disappoint, possibly since Sesshoumaru was fairly certain Touga was jealous his own son out did him before he was dead. When he left Touga's company for good, as an insult Touga hired Kouga as a replacement.

His body tense, Sesshoumaru stopped and glared at him, managing to resist the urge to curl his lip in disgust. Kouga was not known to be an honorable man, and he didn't want Kagome near him. "Mind your own business, Kouga."

Enjoying himself, Kouga opened his mouth but stopped when Kagome strode forward and leaned intimately into Sesshoumaru, looping their arms and hands together. He liked how she fit against him, yet was slightly uncomfortable at such close proximity. He watched as she smiled prettily at Kouga. "Don't feel jealous, Kouga-kun. I know Sesshoumaru is like, the hottest man to walk the planet, but he's mine now. You're going to have to find someone else. I hear his brother Inuyasha is now available."

As Kouga sputtered and his face turned red, Kagome gave him a wink as she led Sesshoumaru inside the building. When she looked up, Sesshoumaru was staring at her with a frown. She blushed. "What?"

He didn't know what to say or do, so he simply allowed himself the luxury of her pretend embrace until she pulled away and they both walked into the elevator.

The minute he reached his fathers office, he left Kagome in the waiting room since he didn't want his father to know she was there, at least not while she was still here. He'd find out later she was, but he didn't need to listen to his fathers ridicule anymore than he absolutely had to. Respectfully, he knocked on the door and waited for his fathers booming voice before letting himself inside.

"Kimiko, did you get the Watanabe's file taken care of?" Touga asked without looking up from his ledgers.

Sesshoumaru waited, softly shutting the door behind him. He studied his father, the wrinkles on his face and the gray hair that used to be as uniquely silver as Sesshoumaru's. "Kimiko?" He looked up, and the questioning look on his face turned to one of derisiveness. "Oh, you. What do you want?"

"I need to make more—"

"Do whatever you want and leave." He said brusquely. "I'm busy."

Sesshoumaru did his business, but stopped with his hand on the door knob on his way out. "Do you even know what day it is today?"

Touga looked up from his papers, irritation in every line on his face. "Is there a reason why I should care?"

"Inuyasha's wedding is today. I thought you were going to be there." Sesshoumaru watched as Touga snorted before standing, his knees popping with age.

"I don't see you there." He said, pouring himself a cup of coffee from his mini kitchen.

"I was there." Not for the reason Touga would think, but at least he had known about it.

Touga took a long swallow from his mug, studying Sesshoumaru from over the rim. "There's something different about you. What, did you manage to steal more clients from me or something?"

"No." Sesshoumaru said shortly. "I merely have a guest waiting outside for me. I must be going."

Touga's eyes cleared and he nodded knowingly. "Ah, a woman. It's about time."

"I didn't know you cared." Sesshoumaru said softly.

Touga snorted before sitting back at his desk, effectively dismissing his son. As chance would have it, Sesshoumaru caught a glimpse of the security T.V. that broadcasted the buildings entrance, and saw Inuyasha running in his tuxedo inside the building. He didn't want his time with Kagome to end just yet, so he hurried outside to find her kicking her heals and pointedly ignoring the odd looks she was receiving from his fathers help.

"Miss Higurashi?" She looked up at him with a smile. "I think it would be in our best interests if we leave."

Her brows crinkled in confusion, and she looked as if she were about to say something when Inuyasha's voice rang through the office. "I know she's in here somewhere! This is the exact type of sick joke that bastard would play on me! Now where is she?"

_No_.

A sinking feeling filled Sesshoumaru's chest and he was so sure she was going to wait for Inuyasha to see her, so he was surprised when she suddenly grabbed his hand, pulling him down slightly to stare at him with panicked eyes as she whispered, "Please don't let him see me."

He stared down at her, unreasonable hope filling him. Quickly, he squeezed her hand and pulled away. "Follow me."

She followed him down a short hallway that took them to a service elevator, and the doors shut on them just as Inuyasha yelled, "Sesshoumaru!"

Again, she was studying him, and didn't stop even once they were safely inside his limo and driving away. "What made you and Inuyasha hate each other?"

Sesshoumaru looked over at her and quickly masked his surprise. And since she managed to surprise him once again, his voice came out sharper than he intended. "That's none of your concern."

"O-okay." Kagome said slowly, leaning back. "How about… how long ago did this rift happen? You know, this could go on forever."

"And I could just drop you off." He didn't really mean it, but he didn't want her to pry too deep in his reasons for hating Inuyasha; she seemed to be the kind of person that would blame herself, when in truth it was his fault for being weak enough to feel such an emotion as hate, and even weaker as to let it control him.

He watched her open her mouth before snapping it shut with a click. "Hum. I didn't think about that."

Amused, he felt a fleeting smile cross his face before giving an exaggerated sigh. "Seven years."

Kagome brightened and leaned forward. "Seven years, huh? That's about the time me and Inuyasha hooked up."

Did she know? He looked over at her, running his eyes over her curls and the flowers and the pearls still gleaming in her hair. Then he looked away, relieved that his embarrassing secret was still a secret. "Right."

She seemed flustered as she hurriedly asked another question. "So why the rift? Inuyasha told me that you once were close, when he was little. He said you were jealous, but he never told me why."

Jealous? Maybe once, but it changed over the years. It was something darker that even he didn't recognize. He hoped she would never know of the darkness he held inside him. It was something he despised about himself. Only the weak let themselves be controlled by emotion, and before Kagome he had considered himself among those ranks. Yet the minute he let jealousy cloud his judgment, pride and despair clouded his sight. He was a fool.

Sesshoumaru didn't look at her again, and he didn't bother with the papers in his lap. He only stared out the window, a frown the only expression on his face. Kagome was still musing, and automatically he tuned in to what she was saying. "Hmm, let's see. Seven years ago I just moved to Tokyo from Osaka, since my grandfather couldn't manage his shrine by himself anymore. Inuyasha had been walking by the shrine when I literally fell down the last steps and landed right in his arms." She crinkled her nose. "He called me a bitch for running into him and dropped me right on my bum."

"Yes, I see now what attracted you to him." His voice was dry, and still a little bit edgy from the force of his thoughts.

"Nah, that wasn't it." She laughed. "I chased after him down the street and pulled on his ears until he apologized. They've always been really sensitive for some reason. You've probably heard the rest, of course." No, he hadn't, but he could guess. "I guess that's why I feel so guilty and surprised on why I left him like that. No matter what, I don't think he deserved getting embarrassed like that. I should apologize but…"

There was a but? Perhaps there _was_ reason to hope. "But what?"

She shrugged. "I just don't want to face him. He can get really angry, and when he gets embarrassed and angry, well… he can say some pretty mean things. I know I probably deserve it, but I just can't explain the panic I felt when I stepped down the aisle." She smiled at him. "But I feel better now, just sitting with you. Isn't that weird?"

Not to him. In fact, those words felt like a balm to old wounds, and slowly he let himself truly relax into the seats. Kagome did the same, curling up on her side to rest her head against the arm guard. He only made a few other necessary stops after that, Kagome choosing to stay inside rather than risk bumping into Inuyasha again. At his last stop, he told Jaken to drive around aimlessly for a few hours unless ordered differently.

She started talking then, saying things ranging from odd little quirks about her family, herself, and her friends, and speaking about her favorite memories. "What is your father like?" She asked suddenly, completely relaxed and stretched out across the long expanse of the limo. She wasn't looking at him, so she didn't see how tense he had become.

Uncomfortable, he shifted. "There's not much to tell. He's not a very nice man."

Frowning, she twisted so she lay on her stomach to look at him dead on. "What do you mean?"

"We're not very close." He evaded, staring straight into her eyes in hopes that she wouldn't ask another question about himself. Many people felt unnerved by his cold eyes, but they didn't seem to have any effect on her.

"Inuyasha says he's not close to him either." She sighed, her eyes wistful. "You guys are lucky. At least you have a dad. Mine died when I was younger, and I don't even remember his face. Mom hid all his pictures when he died since they hurt her too much, so I wouldn't even know him if I saw his picture. You shouldn't waste the miracles you're given, Sesshoumaru. They're taken away too quickly for a person to sometimes handle, and then you don't even know you miss them until they're already gone."

He looked away, not being able to contradict her. "It's not for lack of trying," he finally said, his voice soft. "Yet I am ever a disappointment to him."

Surprised, she sat up. "No way! Inuyasha doesn't speak about you a whole lot, it's true, but whenever he does it's with complete admiration!"

It was his turn to be surprised, and he looked back at her to judge her sincerity. She nodded eagerly. "It's true! The only time he ever gets surly about you is when I bring up the question about why you two are so distant with each other. What _is_ the reason, anyways? I know you probably won't tell me, but it's such a closely guarded secret I can't help but be curious. So, instead, why don't you tell me what you do for a living?"

He did so, haltingly at first in his awkwardness, but before long he was speaking calmly and smoothly about his passions. He only realized that he must have bored her when he finished, and he looked up to apologize. Stopping, he stared at the fascination on her face. "You are... really interested in this?"

"Why are you saying that as if you don't believe it? You're amazing, Sesshoumaru!" She laughed, seemingly delighted. "How many men can claim to be as gifted as you? Even Inuyasha has his limits." She looked down thoughtfully, absently twisting her engagement ring around her finger. "I would think the only obstacle in your path would be to get over the hate you have of your father."

When he looked away, she must have seen something in his face or eyes that he must have given something away, because he heard her soft exclamation. "Ah, I see. You don't hate your father at all, do you?"

When he didn't answer, she smiled sadly. "Quite the opposite, I see. I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru, for assuming how you feel."

He sighed, looking over at her and attempting to smile. "It's alright. It's not as if I give the expression otherwise."

"It's not for lack of trying, right?" She seemed to know he wouldn't answer, so she switched to a different topic. After a while Jaken phoned him and asked if he needed to stop by his private office before the end of the day, and Sesshoumaru agreed, thankful he would have a break before she tried asking personal questions again. Once he got back, however, she immediately picked up the pace of her last conversation. "The only memory I have of my father is at the park, and even then I don't even hear the sound of his voice or his laughter, just the fact that he was there and he loved me."

"You know, when I was little, I used to go to the park a lot. Before my dad died, he would put me on the swings – you know, the harness kind? Where it's like a plastic scoop with little holes on the bottom to stick your legs through?" No he didn't. Only his mother ever cared for him enough to play, and even then it would never be in parks. They had not been allowed off the premises of his father's house. He focused on what she was saying, determined to learn everything he could before his day of paradise was over. "We'd swing for hours. It was just me and him. Souta, my little brother, was just born, so a lot of his time was spent with mom and him. But he'd make sure to spend that time alone together, just us." She closed her eyes and smiled, sighing softly. "It's my most precious memory. What's yours?"

He was silent, wondering if he should answer her. He didn't want to think about himself or his memories, for they either made him wish for his past or dread the future, something he hated. In these last few years, only Rin kept him sane. Considering, he finally said, "My mother."

Yes, his mother. His beautifully sad mother. Unlike Kagome, he remembered everything there was to know about his mother. He remembered how soft her violet eyes were and how dark her hair. He remembered she loved the color violet and he had helped her paint her entire room that color, and even though it looked absolutely horrible afterwards, she kept it just the way it was. She secretly had her maid buy him sweets so they could snack on them during the midnight hours when his father came home with that _other_ _woman_ and they could make themselves think of different things other than what was really going on, enclosed in their own little world of pretend happiness.

He used to bring her flowers because it always brought a smile to her face, and he had hugged her every day since, even as a child, he had known she was never hugged nearly enough. He remembered the way all the servants would collaborate together to keep Touga occupied so they could hide, neither wanting to listen to his harsh words. After a while, Touga stopped looking and just pretended they didn't exist, and that seemed to be exactly what his mother wanted. While it was true he didn't hate his father, he didn't have the courage to tell Kagome that he didn't exactly love him either. It was his fault his mother had been sad. Secretly, Sesshoumaru knew it was his fault she died too. And her name...

Ai, whose name in itself means Love.

Hers was the only love that he had known as a child. To this day she was still the only woman who he loved with every fiber of his being. He would die for Kagome despite the fact that she didn't belong to him, but she would most likely never have the same impact on him as his mother had and she would never be able to touch the part of his heart that belonged solely to his mother, and he believed that was the way it should be.

Kagome had opened her eyes, studying him. She hadn't said a word, merely watched him with such a look that he felt obligated to continue. "My father never paid much attention to either of us once he started keeping his mistress, Izayoi. It had just been the two of us until she passed away."

She was silent, her eyes focused. "I wish I had known you."

"What?" He jerked his head over, his eyes narrowing. What did she mean? What kind of a comment was that after what he had just said? He didn't understand it.

"I wish I had known you then. I think we would've been great friends, don't you think?" She smiled at him, blinking only when she realized they had rolled to a stop. They were outside Tokyo's Juuban Park. Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed and he looked down at the intercom button, seeing the red light flashing and telling him Jaken had been able to listen in on their conversation the entire time. Though he didn't appreciate the eavesdropping, he couldn't condemn him for trying to 'hook up' his boss by taking Kagome to a place she obviously treasured to give them some time together outside the car. They walked around for a bit, looking like an odd pair with her in her sparkling wedding dress and Sesshoumaru in his business suit.

He led her towards the swings, hoping to bring her a small amount of happiness from their time together. He saw her smiling softly, and that was all he needed. He pushed her over and over on the swing, enjoying himself and relaxing more than he thought possible. He didn't usually get comfortable with other people, and he took it as a good sign that he was able to do so with Kagome.

She dug her heels in the sand suddenly and stared at the other end of the park with a fixed expression on her face. Confused, he followed her stare and saw Inuyasha hunched over on a park bench, and his heart sunk a little. His time with Kagome was over. "You should go to him." His voice sounded hollow to even his ears, but she didn't seem to be listening.

Then she touched his hand, the slightest whisper of an embrace. "Will you wait for me?"

He stared deep into her eyes, seeing the conflicting emotions she never bothered to hide, and forced himself to separate his heart from his mind. "Of course."

She stared up at him for only a moment longer before standing to walk slowly towards his little brother, smoothing down her skirt and patting her face and hair. He watched her, soaking it all it, knowing that Inuyasha being Inuyasha would most likely sweep her off her feet once again. She must have said something, for he whipped around and stared at her as if she were the greatest sight he'd ever seen. Then he looked behind her and saw Sesshoumaru watching them, and he saw Inuyasha's face darken before laughing a bit, muttering something.

Kagome looked over her shoulder at Sesshoumaru in confusion, having no idea of the undercurrents swimming between the two of them. He turned to head back to his limo, but stopped, slowly turning back towards the swings. Inuyasha jerked his head towards a path, obviously loath to have a conversation in front of Sesshoumaru. Watching them disappear towards the scenic overviews, Sesshoumaru sat slowly down on the swing she occupied only moments before. He pushed himself absently while he thought over his day with Kagome, closing his eyes and letting each emotion flow through him, wanting to remember everything all the way down to the last detail.

Like how she bit her lip when she was nervous or played with her hands when she didn't know what to say or when she blushed when she was embarrassed. She tended to crinkle her nose when in deep thought or was confused, and she loved to smile. For a person like him, a smile like that could almost be called a saving grace. Perhaps Inuyasha had viewed it as one. People like Sesshoumaru, who was raised by a remarkable woman who loved him fully despite the sadness his father brought her; and Sesshoumaru who grew up the rest of his life with a father who only let him socialize with the people who he did business with, and that wasn't what thrilled a young boy who had just lost his mother.

Of course Inuyasha would want to scoop someone like Kagome up. While it was true he and Inuyasha had grown up under the same rule, Inuyasha had always been able – had always been_allowed_ – to express himself. Unable to help it, he slowly stood up and walked the path they took, stopping just in time to see Inuyasha wrap an arm around her shoulder and pull her into him, Kagome easily resting her head in the curve of his neck. Unable to breathe, Sesshoumaru turned and climbed into his car, ignoring the way Jaken looked behind him to check for Kagome and barked at him to take him home.

Of course; he really was a fool.

His house seemed too quiet, and he instinctively panicked because he knew Rin was supposed to be home, and she was never quiet unless she was sleeping. If she wasn't sleeping she was humming, and if she wasn't humming she was singing, and when she wasn't singing she was speaking to her stuffed animals and having tea. Methodically, he searched every room, his body becoming colder and colder as each room came up empty. Finally, he checked the back yard, finding his babysitter asleep beside the pool in a bikini, Rin still no where in sight.

He stood with his head bowed and his fists clenched, rage so stark and burning hot that he was nearly shaking. With a snarl of rage, he kicked the lounge chair and sent it and her into the swimming pool. She came up screeching, sounding even louder the moment she saw Sesshoumaru's dark countenance. "Oh my God! Mr. Eishi! What did you do that for?"

His lip curled as he watched her swipe hair out of her face. "Yoriko…" He said slowly, softly. "Where is Rin?"

She paled, looking around frantically. "She… she was right here with me. I swear!"

"Daddy?"

They both turned towards the little girl that was peaking her head out from her tree house and rubbing her eyes sleepily. Sesshoumaru turned to Yoriko and sent her a chilling stare. "You're fired."

"W-what? But she's right there!" She screeched, pointing at Rin.

"And yet you fall asleep while you're supposed to be watching someone precious to me. Get your things and get off my property. I don't want you stepping one disgusting foot on my land again, is that clear? If I find you near here, you will regret it." He walked over to Rin, reaching his hands up and cupping underneath her arms and pulling her into his embrace. If she was confused by his sudden affection, she didn't show it, merely cuddling deeper into his arms sleepily.

"Rin was waiting all day for you, Daddy. She made you her special cake." Rin murmured sleepily, and Sesshoumaru inwardly cringed. Her "special" cake was a batch of flour, milk, eggs, and whatever else she thought that looked interesting in the fridge.

He didn't feel up to letting her go yet, so he carried her everywhere he went inside the house. When she was hungry, he fried up some chicken and veggies and sat back to watch her eat and listened as she regaled him about her day. Then she presented her special cake to him stood at his side like an eager puppy. He patted her head affectionately and geared himself up to taste her cake.

"Are you going to try it, Daddy? Rin made it especially for you!" She grinned up at him and bounced a little. He smiled at her, glad that he was able to do so easily with her. The panic he felt earlier had left him drained, and everything about her now seemed more precious than before. Once again he looked down at the special cake she made just for him.

And ate every bite of it.

Later that night while he was lying down and still trying to get over his stomach pains, the door bell rang. He groaned since Rin was safely out of the room and wouldn't get her feelings hurt, and slowly stood up while trying not to jostle his stomach.

"Daddy! There's a princess waiting at the door for you!" Rin hollered, and Sesshoumaru once again felt a touch of panic. She _knew_ she wasn't supposed to answer the door all by herself! A little angry, he strode more firmly towards the front door and prepared himself to scold Rin. He never liked to, since she was to him the perfect child, but sometimes she would either wander away when they were out or do something she knew was against the rules. He'd send this 'princess' away, and then he'd send Rin to her room.

Why shouldn't he have expected this? All day she managed to surprise him. "Miss Higurashi?"

"You can call me Kagome, you know." She waited, and when she cocked her head to the side in question he was finally able to rouse from his stupor.

"Please, come in. Kagome, meet Rin. Rin," He warned, letting her know that she would still get a talk later even though they had a guest.

Rin, the clever girl she was, gave Sesshoumaru a little grin before giving Kagome a curtsy. "My name's Rin. Are you Princess Kagome?"

Kagome laughed, the smile in her eyes when she leaned down and ruffled Rin's hair. "I wish. But I'm just plain Kagome."

"Rin, why don't you go play in your room?" Sesshoumaru said, wanting to talk to Kagome in private and to give her a chance to explain why she was here. He gave Rin's head a pat as she passed, knowing that she'd wait for him to tuck her in.

"Bye-bye Kagome-chan!" She waved before she ran upstairs.

"Cute kid." Kagome said as she looked shyly up at Sesshoumaru. She took off her shoes before coming in any further, and seemed surprised and a little intimidated when she realized how much shorter she was compared to him. "Um…"

He was still at a loss as to why she was still there, so he didn't say anything when she hiked up her skirts and strode further inside. "So I was thinking," she started, not looking at him. "There's this new show playing down at the theaters. Want to come with me?"

She seemed so nervous standing in his living room with her back to him, and he couldn't help but feel warmth at the thought of her being there for him. And he _knew_ it was for him. Why would she be here otherwise? He touched her shoulder gently, surprised when she jerked away. She blushed, looking down. Slowly, he curled a finger underneath her chin and lifted so she could look at him. To tease, he said, "This Sesshoumaru does not watch shows."

At her hurt expression, a whisper of a smile crossed his face. "But he will make an exception just this once."

Her look of happiness made that kernel of warmth burn ever brighter, and that whisper of a smile turned larger, and this time he was able to smile as easily as if he were smiling at Rin. "But first I would like to advise you to wear something different."

Laughing, she twirled. "What, you don't like it?"

"Not that one, perhaps." He said quietly, and pulled Kagome in closer.

* * *

_Six years later…_

The hospital room was empty save for himself, Inuyasha, Kikyo, and a sleeping Kagome that seemed to be grimacing even in her sleep. He stood leaning up against the wall, seeming relaxed and completely uncaring that his wife was currently in the hospital, possibly in the worst pain of her entire life. Inuyasha kept glaring at him, and Sesshoumaru knew he was asking himself how his older brother could simply lean up against the wall and watch as Kagome cried in her sleep. Sesshoumaru didn't need to explain himself to Inuyasha, because Kagome knew differently anyways.

"You're a quiet man, Sesshoumaru." She had murmured one night while absently drawing invisible pictures on his chest with the tip of her finger, her naked body snug up against his and her head nestled against his shoulder. "People say you're a robot, you know. Behind your back. That you don't feel anything."

While he had been wondering what her point was she sat up and graced him with the kind of smile she gave only to him and kissed him gently on the lips. "But I know you. You have so much emotion just beneath that cool exterior; I'm surprised that no else can see how much you really feel. I feel so special that only I can see. Please don't ever change, love. I always want to feel the way you make me feel, and I'm going to be selfish and ask that you show only that side to me."

"Rin knows." He had said, reaching up to stroke her unruly hair.

Kagome laughed. "Rin doesn't count, she's family. I'm talking about other people. Even Inuyasha. Everybody. I'm going to be selfish just this once and claim you just for myself. I don't want any one else knowing how you really feel inside."

She shouldn't have worried. He didn't like public displays of affection and felt uncomfortable saying affectionate things when other people were around. This was exactly why Inuyasha kept saying he was heartless since he merely stood and gave nothing of his conflicting emotions away. Women died in childbirth everyday. She was only five centimeters dilated and in the beginnings of labor, but what if she started hemorrhaging and the doctors couldn't stop the bleeding? Not only would Rin be heartbroken if she left this world, but he would be broken.

Kikyo led Inuyasha out of the room so they could both grab something to eat. After having two babies of her own, she knew this was only the beginning and Kagome wouldn't be having her baby any time soon. Rin was at school, and Kagome had told Sesshoumaru to not bother going and getting her since, as much as they both loved Rin, she would only be bored waiting hours on end for her mother to have a baby and she'd eventually be more in the way than helpful, and might get scared at how much pain Kagome was in.

Once the door was shut safely behind the couple, Sesshoumaru moved and stood beside her bed, reaching out to gently touch her cheek. She was hot and sweaty, her body working to move the baby even while she slept. Gently so as to not wake her, he combed her hair with his fingers and moved her damp bangs away from her face, watching as she suddenly started huffing and her face scrunched up in pain. Instinctively as if she knew his touch, she reached up to hold his hand while she let out low mewls of pain. Finally, her eyes fluttered open and she gave him a weak smile. "Hello, Sesshoumaru."

"Kagome." He murmured softly, using his other hand to stroke her brow.

She reached up and touched his cheek gently, whispering. "It's alright. Please don't be worried about me. Everything is going to be fine."

"Don't ask me not to worry. I will anyways." He said with frown, letting her squeeze his hand tightly when another contraction hit her. With his free hand he dragged a chair over to sit down and kept telling himself silently that if he willed it his hand didn't really hurt as much she was making it hurt. It was all in his head. "Is there anything I can do you for you?"

She hesitated only a minute before asking through a wince. "Can you... oohh... can you please help me relax? Anything... _please_. They're... they're getting worse."

"Of course," he said softly. "Just close your eyes, koi, and let me help you."

She did, and he gently pried her fingers off his and gave her a stress ball that was lying on a table to squeeze instead of his hand, and gently began to massage her skull. He rubbed gently, stroking her hair sometimes before moving down to her neck, then her shoulders. Slowly, she let out a deep sigh and started relaxing her tense muscles. He massaged down her arms and to the tips of her fingers, giving each digit his undivided attention before he moved back up her arm and across her shoulders, down her other arm and repeating the process. Every now and then she let out a tiny cry when the pain seemed to hit just a little more sharper than before, and he always tried to smooth away her grimace of pain by kissing her brow and stroking her face. He moved down her chest to her stomach, his touch now reverent as he gently smoothed his hands over her tummy, kissing every bulge and imagining the child felt every one.

Then he moved down to her hips and slowly pulled the blanket back to reveal her legs swollen with water retention, and lifted the night gown up a little so he could reach underneath to massage her thighs, working more slowly than before since he knew how much her legs had started hurting once they started retaining water. He left kisses in his wake every now and then and finally reached her feet, rubbing her poor ankles and kissing every toe. It was when he was rubbing the arch of her foot that a sharp contraction hit her and the door opened, and she snapped her eyes to the door way and saw Inuyasha watching Sesshoumaru tend to her with a comical expression on his face.

Since she was currently more emotional due to her hormones and the sharp pain she was in, she couldn't help but scream at him, "_Don't look at him! Get _**_out_**_, Inuyasha!_"

Sesshoumaru thought back to that conversation and what she had said; deciding that she had been serious about nobody seeing how much he loved her except her. _"Even Inuyasha.__Everybody. I don't want any one else knowing how you really feel inside."_

Kikyo quickly led a hurt Inuyasha outside and closed the door. Sesshoumaru returned to the massage, knowing that she was tense all over again. He started down her other leg and once again started making his way up slowly back to her skull, murmuring love words all the while and trying to comfort a now tearful Kagome. "Hush now, koi, he's gone now. It's just you and me. Focus on my voice, love, and not the pain. Close your eyes again and focus only on me. Roll on your side for me."

"I'm not allowed to lie on my side." She wheezed, taking in deep breaths as she opened her eyes so she would be able to focus on his face.

"Then don't. Just turn a little so I can reach your back." She did so, and he massaged deeply into her shoulder and back muscles, paying extra attention to her lower back. Slowly, her breath started to even out and she managed to fall into a fitful sleep again. Gently, he rolled her back and pulled her blanket up again so it rested just underneath her swollen belly, then sat on the bed near her knees so he'd be able to comfortably lean over her and wrap his arms around it, resting his head at the very top of her belly. He wasn't putting any weight on her, so he lay there for as long as he could before his back muscles started protesting at holding him still above her for so long, and he finally stood to see if Inuyasha stopped pouting.

Inuyasha was scowling at the floor by the time Sesshoumaru made it to the waiting room, and he waited for Inuyasha to look up before speaking. "She's resting now. Please go sit with her while I speak with a nurse."

"Is she alright?" Inuyasha asked, and the look in his eyes, while worried, told Sesshoumaru that he wouldn't be able to get the picture of Sesshoumaru kneeling at Kagome's feet out of his mind any time soon. With an inward sigh, he hoped Inuyasha would be smart enough not to mention it to Kagome.

"She's fine. I merely want to see if she would be able to take a bath."

Inuyasha glared at him. "She's in labor, jack ass, I wouldn't tell her if she smells or not."

While Sesshoumaru merely cut him a scathing glance, Kikyo elbowed her husband in the ribs. "Don't be an idiot, Yasha. A bath helps with labor pains. The buoyancy of the water takes the pressure off Mom, especially if she is having back labor."

Inuyasha blushed a little before looking away. "Keh."

Leaving them to tend to Kagome, Sesshoumaru went to find a nurse. After a half hour, they were filling up a large birthing tub and had a fluffy white bath robe ready for Kagome for when she got out. Kagome was wheeled over to the room to get as soon as it was ready. Sesshoumaru let Kikyo pass him on the way in, and when Inuyasha went to follow her, he blocked his path and raised a cool brow at his little brother.

Inuyasha snorted. "I've seen her naked before, you know."

"And you never will again. Wait outside." While Inuyasha growled in frustration, Sesshoumaru closed the door in his face. Kikyo had been very helpful to both Sesshoumaru and Kagome throughout the entire pregnancy, offering tips and advice and comfort every time Kagome worried about something she was feeling. Sesshoumaru was grateful as well, since he was nearly as clueless as Kagome about the whole process. They've read up on some techniques, of course, of what to do before and after labor and birth, but sometimes, as Kagome had told him once, a woman just needs another woman to help her.

Kikyo helped Sesshoumaru undress Kagome since she was so exhausted she could only barely move her arms, and together they lowered her into the tub. Kagome smiled at both of them, grateful; while Kikyo started murmuring reassurances and encouragement to Kagome while helping her stay afloat in the bath tub. Kikyo was acting a Kagome's Doula, and had brought cleaning products from home. Sesshoumaru was sure they weren't supposed to use them in the bath tub, but at the moment he didn't care, focusing only on making Kagome comfortable. They washed her hair and French braided it so it would stay out of her face, then pulled her out and patted her dry before helping her put on the hospital gown again, then enveloping her in the bath robe.

Kagome smiled a little and laughed. "I feel as if I'm at a spa or something. Maybe being pregnant is not so bad!" Right as she said that another contraction hit her, and she fisted Sesshoumaru's shirt and leaned her head on his chest to breath through it. He helped her back the wheel chair and waited for Kikyo to open the door before leading her back to the room.

Hours later, Sesshoumaru was holding a pink faced baby in his arms, his back turned to Inuyasha and Kikyo so they wouldn't be able to see the wondrous smile on his face. He leaned down and tucked the tiny bundle in the crook of his wife's arms and kissed her temple, letting her see how his eyes might have been a little more brighter than usual, glossy with a proud sheen of tears in his eyes. He blinked them away and smiled at her while he continued to stroke her hair.

"I'm so proud of you, Kagome." He whispered before standing up straight. The cameras started flashing then, but Sesshoumaru didn't pay attention, so focused on his wife's face as she started drifting off to sleep. She didn't know it yet, but he already had a name for their new child.

He was going to name her Ai.

* * *

A/N: A doula is a woman who supports women through childbirth. "Doula" is an ancient Greek word meaning "servant to women". A doula provides a woman with continuous emotional support, aides in her physical comfort, and encourages the laboring woman. She also provides praise, reassurance, and explains what is going on during the labor. While some husbands and partners may feel that it's their job to offer support to the laboring woman, and therefore initially feel that they would not want a doula, after the birth they are very pleased and relieved that they had one.


End file.
